Mr Brightside

"Jealousy - turning saints into the seas. Swimming throught sick lullabies. Choking on your alibis." - The Killers

 

Meet Mr Brightside. But before that, let me get it off my chest that I think the name per se reminds me sometimes of someone's dick. Nobody I know in particular. It just sounds like a name some queer - no pun intended, maybe - guy would give to his manhood.

However, I did not name my laptop in honour of someone's cock. I name my gadgets like every other way I would name my pets. I named my first mutt Nickie because I could not get enough of Nick Carter. I named my first hamster Freddie because Freddoe Prinze Jr was a charming guy. I wanted to name my current Maltese-Poodle dog Charlie in honour of Charlie Pace from Lost but my sister was not pleased with such common name we eventually settled for Benji, which was kind of brought to my attention because of one of the Madden twins from Good Charlotte. I named my PC back home Stinky because Justin Timberlake was some guilty dessert when he hit solo and he has been nicknamed Stinky. Also because my computer broke down a year later thus leaving me in total panic mode because out of all the assignments I had to keep track of, they were graphic designing assignments. that I named my laptop - yeah, the act itself sounds queer enough - Mr Brightside because prior to purchasing the laptop, it was one of my favourite song at the moment. Mr Brightside by The Killers. Other than that, I also named my iPod Lyla because Lyla by Oasis was a kickass song when I got the iPod.

Mr Brightside was a birthday gift from my parents, given to me two days before my 20th birthday. Back in June 2005, it has been forseen that I will be pursuing my tertiary studies come February 2006 and thus, a laptop is much needed for a nomad student like me. I did mention to my dad that I am going to save up for an iBook and get it by the end of the year. Simultaneously, there was a fair going on in the premises of Gurney Plaza, which prompted me to bring my dad to meet the future Mr Brightside. My dad is not really a tech enthusiast. When I first mentioned I wanted an iBook, he thought I was referring to the crappy local brand I. With that, he is not familiar with the grounds of Mac. Apple. Steve Jobs. Mr Oh-and-one-more-thing annually. Despite that, he decided to cash in. Here, I would like to say my intention to bring him to meet Mr Brightside for the first time was not to have him pay for my laptop. Honest.

See. The Apple Guy - just because I fail to remember his name. Well, I can remember his name because I have his name card lying somewhere in this house but I am a lazy bastard and I would rather just say I cannot remember his name to save my life - told me that the iBooks are running low in stock and in due's time, it will be discontinued. According to him, they will not know when the new batch will come in. Of course I panicked. I am an ignorant little brat hoping to transfer into the Mac world after being cooped up behind Bill Gate's teeny weeny window. My dad, as usual, was standing at the sideline adding fuel to fire, telling me why was it a good idea to make a purchase quick. I succumbed under pressure and gave the greenlight. RM4409 maxed. With six months for me to get used to the new interface.

Probably a couple of months later, the Apple Guy came forth with a practised apologetic look informing me that not only has the price dropped to a mere RM4000, the iBooks were given better specs too. I got the news before he told me because I have been surfing the website. Part of me was fuming. I wanted to disconfigure his apologetic face. Discontinued, my ass. Discontinued because new versions are coming out and I have purchased one of the last stocks of the older version. Do not even get me started on the PR tactic he laid on me about the iPod. In a nutshell, my dad bought one for me while he was in Singapore about a month prior to Mr Brightside's purchase in fear of, once again, discontinuation. I was not half as mad because Lyla is coloured screen and a healthy 20GB with an intact figure of the original version.

With that, I have learned an important lesson to pay constant visits to tech-related sites and listen to my guy friends currently fawning over Apple products for the most up to date Mac news. But I doubt I will see myself making another Mac purchase anytime soon. Sure the Macbook Pros are tempting and the iPod Nanos with bigger memory spaces are enough to send my teeth gritting in force tolerance, but well, it is hard to keep up with the ever-changing tech world. Just get what is enough to satisfy you. Because it is an unnecessary rat race with shadows you will never see the figure of. If you do not end up killing yourself, you might as well do yourself that honour because by then poverty is so fucking jarring your lips will be so tired of cursing Steve Jobs. Whom does not know what is going on with you as he goes on every year having his oh-and-one-more-thing speech while you just sat there and go "Nooooooooo! But can I have that one too?"

Things were not exactly rainbows and butterflies when Mr Brightside first met Stinky.

It was a headache networking the two of them. Stinky - OK, maybe I should not tell the story as if they are human beings. So. My PC would always find ways to deny the laptop's access and Mr Brightside (OK, maybe just once in a while for variation purposes) seems to be speaking French altogether. There were times when I just wanted to give up on my laptop. Yes. Already. I had not even set out of the country in another five months. However, things just slowly worked out. Stinky eventually accepted the fact that I will be mulling over Mr Brightside come next year when I part thus, he might as well make peace with the laptop so I can have a better life in Australia. I am so full of crap. Sheesh. Somebody slap me.

Let's see. Mr Brightside is an iBook G4, if you have not known by now. 12-inch screen. 512MB, which I have to upgrade from a 128MB. A totally limited 20GB HDD space. With my overwhelming music collection - standing proud at 1638 songs till date, thank you very much - I have only approximately 4GB left to utilise. Geez. I think an external harddrive is a good idea right about now. What else. The speaker kind of sucks but I have gotten used to its distant tone and plus earphones work better as always. There is a wireless device. There is no bluetooth.

There was this one time when I so miraculously hanged my laptop in Siberia. I used the infamous backdoor emergency escape I abuse too often while using my PC. Ctrl+Alt+Del. In Apple's case, Ctrl+AnAppleSign+Del. No, it does not work that way. I could still remember myself staring at the frozen screen going, "Now what?" You know sometimes when even the Ctrl+Alt+Del method fails, as I would often like to put it, when all else fails, reset. For a PC's reset, it is to press the reset button. An Apple does not have a reset nub. A reset also equals the unplug of the cable. So. I unplugged the adapter for my laptop. Exactly! This is a laptop for fuck's sake. Of course it is going to keep on running even without the adapter if the battery is fully charged! Now what? Now. I took out the battery. Reset done. Do not try this at home though. It may not be Apple's motto to "when all else fails, disengage your battery to reset". Who knows what kind of consequences will come haunt you once it is powered up again.

As you can see, I am not really pleased. A Windows-based laptop can do better than what Apple has put on the interior plate. Those "I'm a Mac. I'm a PC" commercials lied. My laptop fucking crashed too. Although I have to admit whatever-his-name-is is a goodlooking Mac metaphor himself. And they are funny.

I kind of expected such problems to surface even before I purchased the laptop. It is not as if I came into this absolutely pro-Mac. I am not one to believe that whatever problems I find in Windows I can definitely solve in Mac. They each have their own pros and cons. Macs are less likely to be infected by viruses; Windows are growing viral molds in their assholes. Windows can Ctrl+Alt+Del; Macs do not do that. I am having troubles seeing eye to eye with my parents while you are arguing with your boyfriend whether to have tofu or beef for dinner. We all have our own problems to face.

I would not recommend someone to use a Mac. I am the least enthusiastic Mac user you can ever find. Sure, the external designing is something and the interface is fucking fantastic. Oh, look at the taskbar. Look how the icons just maximise in your face. Shiny. Yeah. However, you are paying more with half of your money going to the design or say the brand name. You have seen the specs. Yeah it has gotten better since then. But it still has not defeated the opponent yet. They all say designers are better off using a Mac. I have yet to see the difference and betterment but I shall believe it in the meantime. Do not expect to DOTA in a Mac lah. (Excuse my Manglish). Or maybe you can. Forgive me, I am never an expert in computer gaming.

So yes. Mr Brightside. Not really a dick. But definitely my laptop I am using during my stay in Australia. Honestly, I am already tired of it. Who knows what will happen once I am done with my studies here. Or what will happen come the end of the year. But in the meantime. Mr Brightside is my laptop, my dick. At least not per se.